List of secrets in The Sims 2 (PSP)

Secrets are a feature introduced in The Sims 2 (PSP). They are pieces of information scattered through Strangetown, to be collected by the player. Once found, they are stored in the My Sim panel.

Types of Secrets
There are three types of secrets in the games.
 * Sim-related secrets: These secrets can be achieved by interacting with the Sim via social minigames. Personal secrets are acquired by reaching to level 4 of the chat minigame, intimate secrets are acquired by reaching to level 4 of the flirt minigame, and dark secrets are acquired after a successful intimidate minigame. A fourth Sim-related secret can only be acquired by completing goals.
 * Secrets of a certain subject: These secrets are found in the world as secret objects, set at a random, yet predestined, order. Again, each subject has four secrets.
 * Mission-based secrets: These secrets are discovered in their own mission, just like the fourth Sim-related secrets, but are acquired in a similar fashion to Secrets of a certain subject.

Secrets of Romance

 * The shortest route to a man's heart is through the Vena Cava.
 * If the woman you love is always nearby, but never seems to notice you... stop stalking her.
 * The key to instant romantic success? Lower your standards.
 * The fires of passion are readily extinguished by the asbestos blanket of responsibility.

Secrets of the Occult

 * Most experts agree that sticking pins in a doll's rear is more effective than in the eye.
 * Bats are useful for cold remedies and curses, but mostly, they're just darn scary.
 * Voodoo dolls can be recycled into clothing, stuffing, or chew toys for dogs.
 * Modern zombies are employed as game developers because they can work around the clock.

Secrets of the Undead

 * Mummies aren't as bad as people make them out to be...they've just got a bad wrap.
 * Zombies don't literally want 'brains'... they just want a decent education.
 * Wild yeti are actually glaciovores, and only pose a threat to aggressive snowmen.
 * The living dead prefer to use the more inclusive term 'respiratorally challenged'

Secrets of the Government

 * The Roswell crash was actually a weather balloon... an ALIEN weather balloon!
 * There is nothing better for your cranial hygiene than a good government brain-washing.
 * The ultimate democracy would allow to vote on all issues and ruin them equally.
 * A typical Sim City is presided over by an elected mayor, a board of advisers, and a giant robot.

Secrets of Hazel Dente's fiances

 * In the Garden... There is a pacemaker buried in Hazel's garden!
 * In the Bathroom... There is a scratched-up wedding ring lodged in Hazel's drain!
 * In the Kitchen... There is a note in Hazel's fridge: 'Help, my wife is starving me to DEATH!'
 * In the Pool... There is a shredded swimsuit in Hazel's pool filter!

Secrets about Monsters

 * The original 'Bogeyman' had a condition that made him secrete snot from his sweat glands.
 * Vampirism isn't nearly as virulent as people think. Most people shake it off like a bad cold.
 * The legend of the Minotaur is false... he actually had the head of a giant gerbil.
 * Dragons once roamed all over the world, but were hunted to extinction by sheep ranchers.

Secrets of Biology

 * Biologists have synthesized a flower that adheres perfectly to principles of Feng Shui.
 * Apparently, money does grow on trees, but the trees all waste it on junk food and hats.
 * If a tree falls alone in the forest, it actually makes the sound of a duck quacking.
 * Scientists can finally communicate with dolphins... but it turns out dolphins are jerks.

Secrets of Engineering

 * Scientists at Division 47 have developed a new energy-efficient fuel based on hair.
 * New military-grade 'stealth toothbrushes' allow oral hygiene without waking the whole family.
 * Aliens built every architectural wonder on earth, culminating in the perfection of Burlington, Vermont.
 * Moore and Murphy predict that every year, computers will double their capacity to go wrong.

Secrets of Intimidation

 * Water torture is generally ineffective, since water doesn't really have anything to hide.
 * 'Good Cop, Bad Cop' isn't nearly as effective as 'Good Cop, Undead Cop'. They never see it coming!
 * If the subject does not yield to the comfy chair, you should advance to the soft pillows.
 * Sometimes you can learn more through love than through cruelty. Just kidding!

Secrets of Aliens

 * Aliens don't have huge black eyes. They just wear ultra-cool alien sunglasses.
 * Aliens don't abduct humans for study... they just need somewhere to keep their unused probes.
 * Curiously enough, most aliens are not flammable, though they are terribly allergic to bees.
 * Flying saucers are the alien equivalent of jetskis. Responsible aliens drive minivans.

Secrets about Virginya Feng

 * The Headstone: Virginya visits a headstone with HER name on it! From the 19th century!
 * The Photograph: You find a picture of 19th-century Virginya. She looks exactly like modern Virginya.
 * The Black Market: You find out that Gimi Branko has been selling packets of plasma to Virginya Feng.
 * The Infection: You are infected with vampirism. You can suck the happiness from living humans.

Roland's Pamphlet says...

 * Always stay with the herd. The stray cow falls into the thicket.
 * Always keep your eyes on the cow in front of you. Attention yields obedience.
 * Always look to the future. The path behind you is strewn with manure.
 * Always be wary... the enemy tips the cow who sleeps.

The Bovinomicon

 * The great cow Beelzebeef slumbers beneath the surface of the earth.
 * When Beelzebeef rises again, she will awaken the Elder Herd.
 * The Elder Herd will trample all those who stray from the teaching of the Kine.
 * Once the earth is cleansed, there will be a new era of peace and delicious grass.