Fanon:Our Relationship

So here I am, a young-ish male who recently moved to the city to escape suburban life. I couldn't deal with all of these things after the domestic abuse incident divorce. I needed a fresh start.

The new girl
I had quite a bit of money through the divorce settlement. Guess I did pretty well on that one. I met a college student named Allegra. She loved to have fun - she loved to do anything. We went on a date to see how things went. I couldn't believe I was with someone who was 10 years younger than me. My father would probably prefer to hear about the domestic abuse incident divorce than me being with a college student.

The downfall
I thought everything was going great for us, I thought she was the one for me, regardless of age. But it didn't turn out to be true. I tried my luck with her and asked her out. But it failed miserably. I hate still loved her after that and I didn't give up hope. If she found someone else, I would hope that they break up soon wish her the best as she truely deserves it. It's such a pity that I failed at my attempt for love after the incident divorce but a 30 year old like me and a 20 year old like her doesn't seem to be the best match, but love builds you up...

But I didn't give up...
...not ever. I wanted everyone to think that my life was a failure success, so I kept trying. I thought about her every night becasue she was all I wanted. My boss wasn't happy with my job performance because I was so worked up over her. The failure didn't end everything, I saw her at the store. I smiled at her, she ignored me. What did I do? Did she have another boyfriend? I never thought I would fail that badly in life because it always happens it is something rare. All I could do was tell myself that I would NEVER give up!

...because the desirable did eventually happen!
I contemplated suicide giving up so many times but something told me that Allegra would eventually give in. I bumped into her at the supermarket and man, it went well. She saw I was visibly upset so she decided to put me out of my misery we decided to go on a date.

That night we wined and dined. It went well. We took things further too. That's when I discovered that she was more experienced than myself. I took her number, knowing that this may lead to something special, something remarkable. I promised to keep her happy and I wanted to do that but things were a little awkward and she wouldn't tell me why.

So for some time afterwards, we just sent texts to each other so much that entrepreneurs thought it would be logical for people like us to do it in real time. We hooked up many times after that but we never got into a serious relationship, which was exactly what I wanted! Is some other idiot kind man also doing my thing with her? I hope not. If it's true, then I wish him all the best with it...

To the present...
So many months passed and we were still friends engaging in "casual activities". I opened my mailbox the other day to find an invitation to Allegra's wedding...Hallelujah! She was with some guy after all. A criminal who can be seen in my eyes as a burglar, not of items but of my heart, my hopes and dreams.

Of course all I could do was think back to the domestic abuse incident man up and move on. The love of my life is getting married today and for my love to her, I hope it makes her a better person. I'm not sure why on Earth she would go for someone like me. I don't know why she did all those things with me. Come to think of it, she did didn't use me for anything - she got her own things on my credit card her own terms and she got fooled around by some punk who's apparently better than me did everything she wanted. I resent admire her for that. I resent respect her for that. But most of all, I resent love her for that.

...and to my own personal thoughts!
I see her on her wedding day looking happy, like noone could kill do any better than the other guy. My friendship with Allegra lasted and still goes on. But if I look past the sleepless nights, the conflict in my heart and soul and the hate I have for the other guy, I can see that my mission was accomplished. The one girl I promised to make happy is indeed happy...just with another guy.

Not long after we met, I couldn't help planning imagining what our wedding day would look like. My second wedding, her first. I pictured her in a stunning dress on that day, with myself dressed in something I got for §5 from ASDA. I pictured us vomiting on the altar, I pictured myself messed up in the pulpit hungover from 10 bottles of rum. I had a feeling she would laugh off my proposal every little crisis we'd hit. As a couple, we were never meant to be but it changes nothing, she's still my true love and she always will be, even if our marriage was reality that ended with yet another domestic abuse case divorce.

So today, my wedding toast is sincere and honest: I wish the deepest and most profound love of my life a happy life, a good life, one in which she gives to and gets from the loved ones in her world the hope and the passion and the comfort and the support she always and so magically gave to me.